3dp5dt

Today I woke up feeling strangely normal. I don't know why but this makes me pessimistic. Yesterday, I felt several uterine cramps, was generally uncomfortable but felt 'pregnant'. Today, not so much. :-(

I've been researching the hell out of HCG levels in one's first beta test (beta test is the blood test at the docs) and I found an incredible site that gathers data from other women in the same position.

85% of normal pregnancies will have the HCG level double every 72 hours. The unfortunate thing is depending on which site you go to, you will get different information as far as what your HCG levels "should be".

"Ovulation" is considered the same day as egg retrieval, thus I would be "15 days past ovulation" when I take my beta test on Thursday.

Here are a couple of charts for singleton pregnancies: (click for a bigger picture)





Basically, it looks like I should be aiming for an HCG level of 100-300. This comes with the caveat that this is the standard, not the exception. There have been women who have had low beta numbers and went on to carry successful pregnancies, however oftentimes low beta numbers mean the pregnancy is about to fail.

Today is a non-emotional day. I feel bad for being a Negative Nancy, but I suppose not all days can be sugar-coated. I think I'm starting to protect myself and prepare for a failure.

I'm looking forward to the distraction of taking my final exam today for school. I'm looking forward to thinking of something other than the little creature in my belly.

And damn if I'm not looking forward to some Mexican food tonight!